Concluding a Ministry?

by James W. Moss, Sr.

Pastor John Smithton sat across the table from me at lunch. He described for me the difficult setting he is in currently. Then he wistfully spoke of the wonderful time he had experienced at Mountainview Church. He outlined how he matched that community and connected with the people of the church. When he left, Mountainview was as large as it had ever been. The attendance had declined significantly at Mountainview in the three years since he left. John couldn’t resist the call to be pastor of a much larger church. My intuition on the occasion of that luncheon indicated that both pastor and people believed his ministry had ended prematurely at the previous church. Unfortunately, his ministry at the new church was going to be a short-term one. Not every ministry that was concluded should have been. Sometimes the pastor leaves prematurely.

Pastor Joe Johnson comes and sits in my office. He sits heavily into the chair with an air of resignation about him. After the small talk is concluded, he says, "I want to leave the church I am serving."

My response is, "Why would you want to do that?" I then pose the following questions:

1. Has God definitively called you from the church you now serve? I believe God releases a pastor from the current assignment before He gives a new one. I believe that God will call you from a work before he calls you to a new work. In fact, I urge pastors not even to interview for other positions unless they have experienced a call by God from their present work. Sometimes in interviewing, a person can get so caught up in selling him or herself that they become convinced that is where God wants them. Some people apparently enjoy interviewing. That was never a pleasure for me. Unfortunately the grass really isn’t greener on the other side of the fence. You know where the potholes are now. You will not know where they are at a new assignment.

2. Have relationships been broken beyond repair between you and the people? Does trouble exist between you and the people? Specifically, is there conflict between you and the leadership core of the church? Harry Brown sat in my office and says, "I know I could carry a congregational vote, but I’m at odds with the leadership of the church." My response was simple and painful. "Ministry is over." The pastor of a pre-existing church is always an outsider. Unless a pastor has earned the rights of the founding pastor, that pastor will always be viewed as an outsider. This is true even in a successful ministry of many years. If the pastor is in conflict with key leadership, it will be the pastor who moves. This is contrasted with a founding pastor. If key families become upset with a founding pastor, it is the people who leave. Continued meaningful ministry requires meaningful relationship. Many of the problems in this arena occur because the pastor has poor people skills. (An earlier article discussed "People Skills." Drop me a note and I will e-mail a copy of that to you.)

3. Have you lost the capacity to dream positively about the future of the church? Can you conceive in your mind at this moment that the church you serve can be more than it is? It is always important for the pastor to believe that the church can be more than it is. Frustration caused by a variety of reasons can destroy the capacity to dream positive dreams.

Some pastors have become apathetic. They really don’t care what happens to their churches. They aren’t in conflict. They aren’t fighting. They have no dreams for the future. Frankly, they just don’t care.

Three significant factors today make it more difficult for pastors to conclude their ministries. The first is the paycheck. Many pastors make more than they could make in the secular workforce. The second is that many pastors now own their own homes. It can be difficult for the pastor and family to sell their home and relocate. The third is the spouse may have a very good job. To relocate may cause the spouse to loose their job, which they couldn’t replace at the same salary level in a new community.

Many years ago a couple invited a real estate agent to come to their home. They wanted to sell their house so they could go in search of their dream home. The real estate agent wrote a description of their home to use in advertising. At the conclusion of the visit the agent read the description to the couple. They responded, "I guess we really don’t want to sell our home. You have just read the description of our ideal home and we didn’t know we had it." Sometimes pastors are serving their dream church and don’t even know it.

If you answer no to all three questions, I ask, "Why do you want to leave? It sounds like you need to take another look at the church you are serving." One genuine yes generally means it may be time to leave and two positives will mean it is time.

Okay, it is time to leave. Remember this: people will remember how you leave. I have watched helplessly as a pastor destroyed years of positive ministry in the two months from the time they read their resignation until they actually left. The people of the church will remember you by the way you leave.

Please do not line up and fire a salvo broadside at the church. It is true the church may be damaged. But the pastor is the real person damaged. Many whose respect you had, though they might agree with what was said, will ultimately loose respect for the pastor.

Please remember that ministry concludes the moment that the resignation is submitted even though there may be a period of time before the pastor is to leave. My advice is to keep your search for a new ministry from the church until you are ready to accept. Even awareness that you are contemplating a change can end ministry. That is not the time to encourage the church to take actions that you wish had been accomplished during your ministry but which you were not able to achieve while there. The proper strategy is to take care of basic pastoral needs and love the people. I have frequently said to pastors in this setting, "Sugar won’t melt in your mouth." Be as nice as you can to everybody. Preserve the integrity of the church so that the church can have a meaningful ministry after you leave. I have concerns about pastors who rejoice when a church they have served for several years has difficulty after they leave.

The current pastor should remove him/herself from the selection of the successor. To become involved in the selection of one’s successor is a course fraught with danger for the church and the pastor. And the pastor should not interfere with the church once they have left. God removes your responsibility for the church with the conclusion of your call for that ministry.

Remember that every pastoral change is a trauma for someone in the congregation. Even unpopular pastors who have been dismissed left behind a few persons for whom they had provided ministry. In fact, when a pastor resigns, the church feels very much as if that pastor has died. And the period of severance may involve some grief counseling for a number of the people. For a pastor to come to the conclusion that the church they have served for years and invested so much of their life in is better off with them leaving than it is with staying is one of the most difficult tasks of ministry. Some pastors stay too long. Discerning the will of God and knowing the right time to leave and doing so is one of the most important decisions of any ministry.

A Good Book: (There aren’t many books written on this subject.) Roy Oswald. Running through the Thistles: Terminating a Ministerial Relationship with a Parish. Published by Alban Institute.

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