People Spots
Online
Produced by James W.
Moss, Sr., and Church Consultants
Provided as a service by New Life Ministries
Pastors, Love Your People!
by James W. Moss, Sr.
Jesus said, "Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. All men will know that you are my disciples if you love one another" (John 13:34-35).
A challenge for pastors to love their people seems inappropriate. Shouldn’t pastors love their people? The answer is obviously "yes!" But I have listened to some pastors describe their people in unloving ways. I have also listened to lay people describe how their pastors have treated them in unkind manners. It is definitively true that some pastors don’t love their people.
Pastor, this is an issue you can’t fool your people on. You may tell your people that you love them, but sooner or later the people will know the truth. The people of a church will get to know their pastor quickly. It doesn’t take them long. It may take the pastor a while to get to know the people but not vice versa. They know the pastor so well that they know when the pastor doesn’t feel well. They know if the pastor and spouse had words before they got to church. They know if something at the church is upsetting the pastor. They will surely know if the pastor loves them or not.
People will not allow a person to pastor them if that person does not love them. A person may preach to them but will not be permitted to pastor. There is a significant difference.
A person earns the right to pastor by loving the people. "They will know we are Christians by our love." A pastor may have to work at that for a period of time before the people really grasp that the affection is real and not a game. This may especially be true if a church has had a minister or two or three in their recent past that really didn’t love them. Unfortunately, some churches have had several pastors in a row that did not love the people.
The people come to appreciate the words "I love you" when they see actions affirming the words of affection. The words are important but they only ring true when accompanied by appropriate actions.
Jesus loved us while we were still sinners. Do the people have to be perfect in order to receive the affection of their pastor? Absolutely not. People who really care for us see our warts and love us anyway. Yes, the people will sometimes be unlovely. But we must love them anyway. Frankly, we pastors are not always perfect and we expect to be loved by our people. They have to overlook some of our faults.
Pastors must love their people so much that they laugh with them, cry with them, share their burdens, and be there when needed. Simply stated, pastors show their love by service. It is called servant leadership. We were not called to be served but to serve.
Leadership and respect are earned virtues. These attributes are never granted because of name or position. They are earned rights. One earns the right to lead by providing good leadership. One earns respect by loving and serving the people. A leader who loves and serves will be readily followed.
Now I’m not naïve. I know about "clergy killers." I know about "alligators." They are out there. But there are not as many as commonly assumed. Sometimes people are given those labels when they simply don’t agree with their pastor. And sometimes those lay leaders are right. I have to tell you that some of my lay leaders protected me from making mistakes.
I have said many times. "Pastors, if you don’t love your people, please find a place where you can and move on." Though I am a strong believer in long pastorates, a failure to love the people is a fatal flaw.
I have watched as people in a church readily forgive a pastor’s faults when the pastor truly loved them. Conversely I have seen the people magnify those faults when that affection is not there. I have listened as people listed a batch of little faults. None of them seemed that important until they listed the big one. "Our minister doesn’t love us."
Ministry concludes from that point on whether the pastorate continues or not.
There is a mean and ugly spirit pervading our culture. Many are very critical of others. Unfortunately, this worldly spirit sometimes pervades the church. Somehow, this mean and critical spirit has to be kept out of our churches. Remember, "They will know we are Christians by our love."
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February 1, 2001. Volume 4, Issue 2. People Spots Online is prepared by James W. Moss, Sr., and Church Consultants. It is provided as a service by New Life Ministries, www.NewLifeMinistries-NLM.org. Articles may be duplicated and reproduced in any way. A new article is produced about every two weeks. To be added to a list to receive these messages directly by e-mail, send a request to churchconsultants@yahoo.com.